Sunday, May 9, 2010


Often we feel emptiness or meaninglessness in our life, even without any significance change in our life or way of living. Probably we feel it when our life events become a routine, may be it when we are not able to entertain ourselves or the entertainment itself become a routine, or when we encounter a joyous moment where we have a feeling of mission accomplished or at an extremely sorrow moment.

There is a difference in the emptiness we feel, in each of these events. In one set of events, the emptiness or meaninglessness due to the fact that thought is active but it cannot find anything to chew and the thoughts are tiered with the usual chewing. In another set of events, it is due to the fact that the thought itself is not there. The emptiness or meaninglessness in this case is due to the absence of thoughts, where being submerged in the field of thought is our usual way of living.

The first set of emptiness is due to the fact of repetition of events in our life. When the life events are just repetition, it becomes a habit and the consciousness does not have any function there. Due to our lifestyle, our consciousness has shrunk to a small layer where it lost its capability to observe the continuous changes within our body and mind. There are many, many activities happening within our body and mind, but they have already gone beyond the reach of our consciousness. Since the consciousness has shrunk and shrinking, we have to fed consciousness with new activities to keep it active. When the consciousness is unable to find any activity, the ego is also not fed with anything. When the ego is not able to find any supporting events, it projects emptiness and meaninglessness so that the consciousness is motivated to find activities and hence the ego is supported. In the other side when we are sensitive, the consciousness goes deeper and deeper, where we start understanding the function of ego and its illusionary nature. The deeper we understand about our ego, the less will be the projection of emptiness or meaninglessness of life.

Again we feel emptiness or meaninglessness of our life, when entering in to the realm of philosophy. The philosophical quest may ground all our beliefs on which our life is supported. Once the beliefs, morality, etc, which formed the base of our egoistic existence are grounded the outward activity required is just for the survival of our physical body and we start ignoring our ego. Yet our ego is possibly active within us. When the ego is active, it must be fed with activities which support its existence. When our philosophies direct us towards meaninglessness with our regular activities except the survival of physical, the ego get into a struggle for its survival and project that the life itself is meaningless without the activities that support the very existence of ego. It is a trap by our ego for its survival. To get out of this trap, we must have the understanding of trap – the ego itself. If not recognize this trap, our philosophical quest may lead us to emptiness

At moments of extreme joy or extreme sorrow or moments of accomplishments, we may enter into a state of emptiness or meaninglessness. During such moments, the thoughts cease to exist. It is a moment where we have a feeling that nothing else to enjoy or nothing else to suffer or nothing else to achieve. As long as we are in that state, without any thoughts it is fine. As soon as the thoughts come in again, it tries to capture the moment of thoughtless state. The active ego projects it as emptiness of life. If there is nothing available to support the ego, it is emptiness for ego, even in actuality we live in abundance. As long as the ego is active, we may not be able to perceive the vastness of this emptiness or the emptiness which enclose everything else with in it. In such moment of thoughtlessness, if the ego is not active, the emptiness contains everything within it which the mind can perceive.

On one side, the feeling of emptiness and meaningless provide enough motivation for carry on with our daily activities, but the sensitivity of our body and mind are taken away. On the other side, we regain our sensitivity towards our body and mind or our consciousness is being expanded, but may live with a depressed feeling of emptiness. On an over look, this seems to be contradiction. Because this translates into the postulate that for having sensitivity we have to be with emptiness and meaninglessness. For, sure it cannot be the case. Instead of having a depressed empty life, being insensitivity may be a better option. If we analyse that feeling of emptiness or meaninglessness, it will be very clear that such state is not the real state, but a projected state. As long as the ego is active, it creates conditions to support it. The feeling of emptiness or meaninglessness is such condition created by our ego to find enough motivation for getting into activities which support ego. The feeling of motivation is a condition created by our ego, to get support. Out of this motivation, we are ready to go any distance – at the end the ego is satisfied and supported.

We may need motivation for doing any activity. But motivation is a condition created by our ego. This again seems to be a conflict. To resolve this conflict, we may have to understand what motivation is? Can we carry on our life with our complete capability without the need for any motivation? This may be a subject of another title “Motivation”.

On one side, we lose our sensitivity due to the routine activities and hence habits. With this insensitivity to happenings within us and around us, the ego needs more violent activities and hence projecting the feeling of emptiness. On the other side, due to our sensitivity, momentarily we enter into a state of thoughtlessness and in this case also, the ego projects the feeling of emptiness. A real conflict, difficult to resolve! Ego is the base for this conflict and understanding our ego is the only way out to resolve this conflict. Once we understand our ego, ego is no more!

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