Friday, April 24, 2009

Dependency

In this universe everything, whether animate or inanimate, is depend on many other things for their survival. Hence dependency is a factor which we inherited from our ancestors, which in turn has the history from the time of creation. But dependency at another level, takes away our freedom and becomes the cause of bondage and hence the cause of our suffering. Hence it may be helpful to understand the term Dependency towards our quest of having a world of our choice.

At one level we depend on our parents, our spouse, our children, our neighbors, our society, etc for fulfilling our day-to-day needs. Without such dependency we cannot have a social life. At another level, we depend on the life of many other living organisms for our basic needs like food (irrespective of vegetarian or not), shelter and basic survival. Without the sacrifice of lives of many other living organisms, we cannot even survive for a day. At a much subtler level, even the inanimate objects depend on other objects for their existence. This is true for sub atomic objects to the cosmic objects.

There is another level of dependency which we create ourselves out of ignorance, which then becomes source of our sufferings. This is the psychological dependency, which we create with our relationships, with our possessions and with our desires. Let us analyze the mechanism of psychological dependency and its role in our life. Once we have the understanding we will be able to decide its role and its need in our lives.

For our needs we depend on two set of people, with one set, we are not emotionally related where as with another set we are emotionally related also. The first set is like grocery agent, news paper agent, vehicle mechanic and so on. In this case, they depend on our need of their services and we depend on their services and there is no emotional factor attached with this dependency on either side. Here if one grocery vendor is not servicing us we can get another one. Hence we never look for the security of service with one particular vendor and hence there is no emotional factor, and hence no psychological dependency. Basically, dependency is need based. The above dependencies are physical need based and we cannot avoid those dependencies, and there are no problems for us due to those dependencies.

The other set is our parents, spouse, children, friends, and similar relationships. There are certain levels of real needs from these relationships. We do not stop our dependency with these relationships at real, required level, but elevate it to emotional level. This is due to the fact that we are in need of emotional content from these relationships. On the other hand, we are emotionally void and hence we tend to fill that emotional void by emotional content from our relationships. The general understanding of us is that without that emotional factor towards the relationships, what is social life and why do we need a social set up like family? Yes, we need emotional factor towards our relationships and with the society, but that should be due to our emotional fullness and not due to our emotional emptiness. If the emotional factor of our relationship is not due to emotional emptiness, then there is no need for emotional dependency for us and there is no suffering for us due to our dependency with our relationships. In such case, there is no question of this discussion at all. But the fact is that we are completely void with respect to our emotions. What we call as emotion within us is just the need of us arising out of this emotional emptiness and due to the projection of our mind but we perceive it as the emotional content we are providing to our relationships due to our ignorance.

There is a third level of dependency in which we depend on many of our material possessions. Out of the possessiveness we build around those possessions, we become emotionally dependent on these possessions. Off late we have reached a level in which our emotional dependency towards these possessions are gone beyond a tolerable limit. In case we lose any of those possessions, we will be down psychologically. This is the real problem – the psychological falling which is the result of emotional dependency. Of course, the loss of certain possession is definitely a loss with respect to our ability to do certain function because the execution of that function depends on the possession. But if it reaches a level where the loss of that possession pull us down psychologically, then something wrong in the type of dependency we have with that possession.

If our emotional factor towards our relationships and possessions arises due to our fullness, then there will not be any suffering for us due to that emotional factor. In the sense, irrespective of the reaction of that relationship towards as, our emotional content flows towards that relationship and due to our emotional completeness, we do not need any emotional factor from that relationship; if at all that relationship is unable to give. If we are emotionally empty, how can we approach the relationships with the emotional factor? We can only expect the emotional content from our relationships, while (actually) nothing to give back. When every one of us in the society is emotionally void, how can our relationships approach us with the (actual) emotional content which we need? Cannot be! Hence the real problem is that every one of us is emotionally void and trying to fill that void by depending on others. Unfortunately all our relationships are at the same level and our emotional need will never be fulfilled. The end result is suffering to us and our relationships.

The only way out is to understand this fact. Once we understand the cause of emotional dependency, we will be free from it; simultaneously we will be emotionally complete by ourselves. These are mere psychological factors and basically evolved due to the projection of our mind. It is not a real dependency. That is the reason, as soon as we understand these deficiencies, it will be filled immediately. In other words the emptiness is due to our ignorance of the facts. Once we understand the facts, our ignorance will be wiped out instantaneously and hence we will be free from illusions. This freedom gives us the fullness and it is an instantaneous change. As soon as we understand the fact, the suffering will be ended because it is a mere psychological factor.

The real problem is to bring in the necessary understanding. As we discussed multiple times, our conditioning is the blocking stone on the path of understanding. Unless we are free from the conditioning, which is result of inheritance, we will not be able to wipe out our ignorance and hence illusions. Until the time we live illusionary life, without looking into the facts and logic of existence, we are not going to be free from our conditioning and hence our suffering. Until the time we are free from suffering, we can look nothing, but a problematic world. At this level, naturally we would like to change the world from what it is. We ourselves are not free from suffering, how can we end the suffering of world?

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Responsibility

We are discussing about the change we want to have in the world as we are seeing a complete chaos in the world around us. Based on the discussion so far, every one of us sees a different world. The world I am seeing is entirely different form the world you are seeing. No two persons will see the same world. The reason is that the world we see is the projection of our mind and no two persons think alike and hence the world of no two persons will be alike.

This implies that if we are seeing complete chaos in the world, essentially our mind is in complete chaos. During the discussion so far, we have seen some of the reasons for such a chaotic mind. So far we were discussing about constructed qualities which we need to wipe out from ourselves to get ourselves free. Responsibility is one action which we have to adapt. The action with responsibility will help us to get away with those constructed qualities. Responsibility is stated as action rather than a quality because we never identify ourselves with it. Qualities are some thing with which we are attached and hence identified with. Responsibility is an action out of us.

If we look deep into our day-to-day life, we take responsibility for ourselves of all our successes and with things whichever we are happy with in our life. But if there is some problem in life, we rarely take responsibility for that problem; we rarely recognize the problem is due to some of our actions for which we are responsible. We readily find someone else to pass the responsibility for our problems. We also fail to recognize the quality of life we are living is entirely based on our actions. The actions might have been stimulated by somebody else or something else. But the actions were performed by us with our complete knowledge. Hence we are completely responsible for what we are today, whether we are happy or not happy with our present state. Of course, we are thankful to those stimulating environment- be it our parents, or well wishers or whoever it be.

In most of the cases, we shift the responsibility of our present state to somebody else and if we could not get those somebody else, it is very easy to shift that responsibility to God or Cosmic power; as nobody understand what it really mean and God never questions us for this action, and hence we are not answerable to anybody for shifting the responsibility of our failures and problems towards God. But, by doing this, we lose our freedom. We enter in a state of fear, which will be the breeding point for all our constructed qualities and hence all our problems.

When we take responsibility of our action means, we will be completely aware of our actions. We will be also aware that the result for the action is not only depends on our action, but many external situations also. As we completely take the responsibility of our actions and hence aware of the external conditions, we respond to all these external situations and now we are in a position to accept the outcome of our action, whatever it may be. The key point here is that taking responsibility of our action drastically improves our awareness and once we are aware, the less will be the fear and hence less will be the possibility of creating other constructed qualities out of our action.

When we shift the responsibility of our actions to somebody else, we are choosing the escape route, which in turn make our awareness to shrink. The less our awareness, the more will be chances of getting into fear. Once we have fear there is no escape from suffering.

If we would like to change the world around us, we should be capable of assuming responsibility for all of our action. If we are not able to take responsibility of our actions, yet want to change the world from ‘what it is’ to ‘what should be’, then we are creating more problems for ourselves and for the world. In such case, it is better to live our own life in our own way, instead of worrying about the world, as it has no meaning for those who are not ready to take the responsibility for their own actions!

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Anger

Anger is one of the constructed qualities, which affect our inner freedom. Until the time we have the quality anger, we can’t have inner freedom. Unlike qualities like attachment and possessiveness which affect us just psychologically, anger affect us psychologically as well as physiologically. When we are in anger (Or just after recognizing anger within us), the blood pressure increases enormously and certain acidic substances are added into our system. Both of these physical effects of anger are harmful to our body.

Let us analyze the source of anger and this knowledge may be helpful, if we wish to avoid anger within us and hence we will be approaching psychological freedom and eliminating unnecessary blood pressure spikes and unnecessary addition of acidic substances in our physiological system. None of us really want these side effects of anger, and hence anger also. However we are unable to control anger when it arises and we are aware of our anger only after it is over. This may be due to our lack of understanding of the mechanism of anger and its source.

Whenever the projection of our mind is challenged, our mind expresses the reaction as anger. The intensity of anger depends on the intensity of challenge. When we are caught in psychological bondage, the mind always project everything it sees, make it as an image and store it back in the memory. Depend on the usage of this image for our survival, the mind seeks security for the projected image, and this will be breeding point of attachment and possessiveness. Hence the intensity of our anger depends on how far we are attached with the image projected by the mind or how far the mind seeks security of that image.

We have built an image about us within our mind, which is basically what we refer as ourselves. This includes images like I am this religion; I am this caste; I am the native of this state; I am this national; I am the follower of this leader; I am the follower of this Guru, and such endless I am…. The more the number of such identifications we have about ourselves, the possibility of bondage is more and hence the frequency and intensity of our anger. The less the identification we have about ourselves, the less will be the frequency and intensity of the anger. This leads to the conclusion that we will be nearing psychological freedom as fast as we eliminate entities with which we are identified. Once there is no more identification about ourselves within us, the “I centeredness” or “Me” or “Self” cease to exist and that will be the ultimate freedom.

To reach such a state, we need not forgo the relationships in this world; need not leave behind any possessions we have; do not cease the enjoyment the existence provides to us and need not isolate ourselves from the society and culture. What we just need is an understanding of existence. And a change within us to live synchronized with the existence. Nothing more is demanded from us to have a realized, joyful life.

Let us go some more details of relation between anger and our self identifications. Let us assume we belong to the religion “A”. This means, we have strong belief about the teaching of religion “A” due to constant and prolonged insistence of the principles and value system of religion “A” within us. We are conditioned such a way that, we started feeling a great sense of fulfillment and pride with the image of being belonging to that religion. This will give a sense of pride when we say I am the follower of religion “A” and we go to such a stage that we identify ourselves as I am an “A”ian. Now we are deeply identified with the religion “A”. Now one person belong to religion “B” and as deeply attached with that religion as we are attached with “A” comes to us and question the validity of certain principles of religion “A”, we do not need any time to reach the peak of anger. The less our identification with religion “A” the more we see the validity/invalidity of the challenge and have the capability of logical reaction. If we are not at all identified ourselves with religion “A”, any question about the validity of religion “A” is not at all a challenge to us, and there is no need for us to react for that challenge, except showing logical reaction, if we wish to do so. When we do not identify ourselves with any of the religions from A to Z, none can make us anger by challenging with respect to religion. This does not mean that we should not follow any religion or belief system. We can follow any religion or any belief system of our choice. But we should also take the choice of not being identified with the religion or belief system. It may be a bit difficult to digest this argument. But if we allow our intelligence to work, it is not a difficult task to follow something, but not identified with that something. Such intelligence will provide us ultimate freedom from all bondages. Once we are free from the bondages, we will be peaceful within us and the world projected by our mind is also in peace!

One more point we need to note about anger is that we never were aware of anger, when we are caught in anger. We realize that we were angry only after the real anger is gone. We normally refer the reaction of anger as anger. This is one of the prime reasons, due to which we are unable to get freedom from anger. If we go little deep into the quality of anger, at the time of anger, there is no identification about ourselves. We lose ourselves completely, which is desirable and we are striving to reach such a self-less state. But due to undesirable nature of cause of anger, the after effects of anger are undesirable. When our images are challenged, based on the intensity of challenge, we entered the state of anger with proportional intensity. Within moments, we get into self identification and the undesirable effects of anger will start to manifest. With the self identification with images and with the challenge, we enter into a state of desperation and we normally call this state as anger, because we are aware of only this state and not the real anger.

We will be able to recognize this fact if we analyze the instant of latest anger, its cause, reaction, effects and the state of mind during the whole of this process.

The important point here is that if we are capable of observing the real moment of anger, we will understand the cause of this anger, which is the self identification with images, and will be able to eliminate it completely. To observe the moment of anger, we have to allow our intelligence to work. For the intelligence to work, we need to bring necessary changes within ourselves so that we are free of the conditioning of ourselves, at least to the extent of neither accepting nor rejecting any of our value systems and have the openness to see the things as it comes without accepting or rejecting whatever comes to us.